Monthly Archives: December 2000

One of the reasons people stop learning is that they become less and less willing to risk failure. – John Gardner I like this equating of learning to risking failure. I’m proud that I learned to snowboard about three years … Continue reading →

Work is love made visible. – Kahil Gibran Now there’s a whack on the side of the head. I rarely hear anyone talk about work this way. But this helps as I contemplate some decisions about Real Joe that I … Continue reading →

The Jan/Feb 2001 issue of Men’s Health Magazine has an article by Joe Kita titled, The New Depression. He describes a type of covert depression called “dysthymia.” One physician in the article says, “Any person with a chronic sense of … Continue reading →

I took a few snapshots of our house and town today and created a quick web page. This has turned out to be a gorgeous winter thus far, even though it’s still officially autumn. I hope it’s a record-breaking year … Continue reading →

Men can only be happy when they do not assume that the object of life is happiness. – George Orwell I believe that the very purpose of our life is to seek happiness. – The Dalai Lama Can both of … Continue reading →

We were to have a memorial Mass for my dad St. Peter’s church in Mendota this morning, then a small family gathering at my mom’s house. But the highways were gridlocked from the snowstorm and we had to call the … Continue reading →

If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life. – Albert Camus Winter today, in southern Minnesota, … Continue reading →

The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears. – John Vance Cheney This is an interesting way to think about the tears I’ve been shedding lately. The problem, though, is that tears can mean a lot of … Continue reading →

The therapist told me I have to be angry for the amount of caretaking and peacemaking I’ve done all my life with my parents and family, that I couldn’t just be a kid and have them nurture me, that I’ve … Continue reading →

My wife Robbie reads my weblog (Hi Sweetie!) and sometimes comments on it later in the day. A few times we’ve gotten into arguments about whatever the issue was I was writing about, which has proven to be helpful. I … Continue reading →

To render ourselves insensible to pain, we must forfeit also the possibilities of happiness. – Sir John Lubbock I guess this a way to reframe the difficulty of working through this emotional shit with my parents. It’s hard work. It’s … Continue reading →

A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. – Dorothy Canfield Fisher Since I was a teenager, I’ve prided myself on the fact that I didn’t ‘lean on’ either my father or … Continue reading →

I told Robbie last night that if my dad had beat me as a kid, I’d be a lot more like him, a lot tougher on the outside, full of rage instead of just fear. He hit my sister a … Continue reading →

My mother’s coming down for a family therapy session today with me and Robbie. We’ve been pretty much estranged for the last ten years since my dad went ballistic on Thanksgiving back in 1991. Robbie and I insisted that we … Continue reading →

I’ve added a sidebar to the Real Joe home page for subscribing to the email lists. And I’ve added a Joe to Go mailing list option in several places, too – just text for now, but I’ll add an HTML … Continue reading →

We like someone because. We love someone although. – Henri de Montherlant I think this could be a confirmation of why the Eulogy I wrote for my dad is right for me. I can’t really say I liked my dad. … Continue reading →

Every bone in my body seems to say about Real Joe: “This is what’s needed.” But I can’t be sure. Besides, if I don’t yet have the skills to sail in this storm, I’ve got to figure out a different … Continue reading →

Robbie read the first draft of my Eulogy to my Pappy. She wondered, if I read it out loud at our family gathering next week, whether the family members who are still mad at him will be offended by it, … Continue reading →

If your life is ever going to get better, you’ll have to take risks. There is simply no way you can grow without taking chances. – David Viscott I’ve taken risks in launching this business the way that I have. … Continue reading →

I’ve got a first draft of Eulogy to my Pappy up. I probably won’t have it edited till after I actually read it out loud when we have a little service at Mom’s house next week after a memorial-type Mass. … Continue reading →

We see things not as they are, but as we are. – Henry Major Tomlinson Reframing. Paradigm shifting. Glass half-full. Et al. Those phrases are so overused they seem trite, yet it’s amazing to me how often I can shift … Continue reading →

I started lifting weights yesterday–circuit-type machines at the local Senior Citizens Center. I went with my wife Robbie and daughter who started going there last week. I generally hate weight lifting of any kind. I know I need to do … Continue reading →

It occurred to me last night that I’ve temporarily passed on the pursuit of a bunch of material stuff while trying to get Real Joe on his feet. I’ve had to put aside my desires for a new trials bike, … Continue reading →

I’m reading a book called “How to Want What You Have” by Timothy Miller and it’s got the best rationale for meditation that I’ve ever come across. He calls it Soto-Zen style meditation. It’s most visible difference is that it’s … Continue reading →

The only measure of what you believe is what you do. If you want to know what people believe, don’t read what they write, don’t ask them what they believe, just observe what they do. – Ashley Montague People ask … Continue reading →