I talked to my brother last night who said that Dad’s got to be moved to a nursing home of some kind… and that Mom’s not up to doing it. I’m trying to decide whether I should take over, or whether I first insist that she work with the social worker at the hospital. She disagreed with me on a couple of other decisions so I’m inclined to pull back and just say I’ll be glad to weigh in with my opinion but I’m not taking the lead.
I ran into a chiropractor buddy at the racquetball club this morning who suggested some techniques for stimulating dad’s nervous system, since it’s common for it to shut down in frail elderly people who’ve been on lots of meds. So I’ll try that. And maybe sneak some vitamins into his food.
Is this a good plan? Am I acting with my own agenda in mind? My ego? My unresolved issues with them? Man, this is complex territory.
My sister might be able to come visit dad. Last night, Robbie and my daughter came up to the hospital with me last night to feed dad a big piece of pumpkin pie which he devoured. It’s the first time Robbie’s seen him in ten years or so since he attacked her verbally at Thanksgiving ten years ago. I wonder if all of this could be a catalyst for more family healing? I guess I’ll just keep listening for direction. ‘Make me an instrument of peace.’ It never occurred to me that I could be an instrument of peace for my own family. Too messy. Too loaded. But what the hell. It’s a learning situation, not an agenda situation.